Just my rambling mind

By: Carolyn Hileman

Most everyone knows I am a Catholic, I attend Sunday Mass regularly, I do not agree with everything the church mandates since I also believe that any time you 100% agree with any church without any hesitation you have joined a cult. I believe God gave us a brain and he expects us to use it, men are fallible, God is not. With all that being said, I suppose I just tend to question everything and right now I am questioning our churches as a whole. You see I just cannot wrap myself around the idea that one group of sinners is better than another, especially since we are all sinners. There is a double standard being played out for the whole world to see and it isn’t very pretty. On one hand the church and it isn’t just the Catholics are protecting sinners who have come to this country illegally and continue to sin on a daily basis by using someone else’s identity.

All the while they are damning the gay population to Hell, if we are to understand the weaknesses of our illegal population, the reasons for their sins and forgive them and welcome them to the church, then should we not treat the Gay population the same? Why two separate standards for two different sets of people? Why is it that the one group is allowed to sin regularly and without blame and the other is castigated for doing the same? You will forgive me if it seems just a little two faced to me, if it seems one groups sins supposedly out weighs the other. While some priests and preachers deem it fit to march for the people who come here illegally, they shun and shy away from anyone who is gay and they will openly boycott or smear anyone who donates to them. We are repeatedly told that, no human is illegal, that we are all God’s children, we all have our differences, but we still give communion to the people who openly sin just by being in this country illegally and often refuse it to the gay population, are they not God’s children as well?

How is it that we as God’s children can alienate one set of his children and openly love another, is that what the Bible teaches us? Now one can say that one set had a choice but the other did not, but that would be untrue. Both chose the route that was easiest for them and by church standards both are equally as wrong, yet one is targeted by the church while the other is welcomed and that sends a message that maybe we are not as Godly as we purport to be. I know some Gay people and I converse with them on a regular basis, we do not discuss their private lives or mine for that matter and we get along just fine, they believe in God just as much as I do and are very good people. So I am left to wonder why it is that they are the target of such bitter, hateful treatment by people who claim on a regular basis that God has an unconditional love.

Are we to assume that the unconditional love only applies to certain groups of people? Are we to believe that our Lord would approve of the double standard we have set up? Each of us sin on a regular basis and to say we don’t is probably one of the greatest of all sins. Be it the little white lie, the sin of gluttony, self-righteousness, bigotry or hatred, we all sin and fall short of the glory of God. I am in no way endorsing Gay marriage, simply because I personally do not believe it is right, that is my opinion, not necessarily endorsed by God. What I am doing is asking the question of how can we put one above the other, how can we the mortal humans decide which is the greater sin? If we are to open our hearts and doors to people who came here knowing what they were doing was wrong and then furthering their wrong doing by stealing someone’s ID, then shouldn’t we open our hearts and doors to those whose only real sin was loving what we believe is the wrong type of person?

It raises an interesting question doesn’t it? It makes you think, not just accept the churches teachings. I suppose I got my questioning nature from my dad, he very seldom set foot in a church because he felt they were all a bunch of hypocrites. My Mom on the other hand was in church every Sunday and several days during the week. I learned from them both, I learned from my Dad that you should never assume that the preacher is God and that everyone in the congregation is Godly. I learned from my Mom that God expects you to show up on a regular basis to see and hear him. I learned from my Dad that sometimes the people in the church are the reason you can’t. I learned from my Mom to learn to ignore those people and focus only on God, and I learned at a very early age to listen to what the preacher was saying and decide on my own if that is what I believed God wanted us to do.

I still practice that today; I will sit and debate the priest in my head as he is giving his homily that is of course if the priest has not irritated me in some way, then I tend to tune them out. However, we have been blessed with a wonderful priest now and I enjoy his homilies because I can dissect them while he is speaking, a lot I do not have to dissect simply because I agree. Though here lately the topic has been acceptance, how we all have differences and how we should accept those differences and be good Christians. But of course me, being the debating kind I sit and I think how can we do that when our church openly vilifies the Gay population? I know that he is talking about the illegal immigrant situation because it is by no means a secret that I was the leader of several rallies, I know he is either trying to convince me I am wrong or trying to calm the lynch mob who wants my head, but my thoughts turn to the double standard of it all.

Maybe I should discuss this with my priest, maybe I should just forget about it. That is not so easy; this question keeps popping up, when I am supposed to be sleeping, when I am supposed to be working and when I am supposed to be listening to the priest. So I am left to assume that God wants me to better understand or to pose the questions to you. How can we who profess to love everyone, set aside a group of people from that love because they do not follow our teaching to the letter? How can parents turn their child away based on their belief in God when we are all taught hate the sin not the sinner? Perhaps it is the fear of the unknown, maybe we are afraid their choice will somehow rub off on us. Or perhaps we thought God did not mean it when he said love one another as I have loved you, if we were to do that then I suppose there would be no double standard.

About The Author Carolyn Hileman:
The Voice http://www.thevoice.name/

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