The Immigration Reform Act For Dummies Part 2 of 2

By: Bob Parks

According to a recent and stupid Washington Post – ABC News poll, more people would be for legalizing illegal aliens if they pay a fine for their violation of our border and law. What the Washington Post and ABC News failed to tell those in the poll was that the compassionate, tolerant, inclusive left are already trying to find politicians to lessen or strike altogether the fine because they’re too punitive on the poor illegals.

It’s abundantly clear that the people responding to the poll, as President Bush has pointed out many times, don’t know what they’re talking about.

We continue on our refresher on what’s in this bill so we can make a much more informed evaluation of the Ted Kennedy (again) Bush amnesty bill.

Authorizes the Secretary of State to award a grant to a U.S. land grant university to establish a university-based Mexican rural poverty mitigation program.


Sets forth provisions respecting: (1) additional DHS and Department of Justice immigration personnel; and (2) the Board of Immigration Appeals.

More government workers.

Kendell Frederick Citizenship Assistance Act – Provides that fingerprints provided by a qualifying individual at the time of military enlistment shall satisfy naturalization fingerprint requirements.

Are the fingerprints of a foreign national joining our military going to be different once the bill is signed than they were prior to?

While I was in the Navy, I saw many of a certain nationality that were in poverty one moment, gleefully bossing around Americans the next. Even their kids looked down upon us lowly Americans who had to jump when their daddies said so.

Now all those assholes need do is provide fingerprints so we can also pay for their uppity families.

Is there anything in this Act that’s good for Americans? I know; at some point in the near future, President Bush will explain it all to us.

Requires the Secretary to establish a toll-free naturalization assistance telephone number for Armed Forces members and their families.

What the hell; everything else is free….

State Court Interpreter Grant Program Act – Provides state courts grants to assist individuals with limited English proficiency to access and understand court proceedings, and allocates funds for a related court interpreter technical assistance program.

So states won’t have to pay for that anymore. We’ll pay for that with our federal taxes. One question should be why are these people in courtrooms in the first place? Sure, bad things happen. But many people in this country go their whole lives without going to court.

If you look at some major Southwestern cities, a large percentage of the prison population is made up of illegal aliens. If they had bothered to try and obey our laws and assimilate, we wouldn’t be paying for their interpreters.

Border Infrastructure and Technology Modernization Act – Provides for: (1) a port of entry infrastructure assessment study; (2) a national land border security plan; (3) a port of entry technology demonstration program; and (4) expansion the Customs-Trade Partnership Against Terrorism programs along the northern and southern borders.

What about… THE WALL?

September 11 Family Humanitarian Relief and Patriotism Act – Provides permanent resident status adjustment or cancellation of removal and permanent resident status adjustment for a qualifying alien who was on September 10, 2001, the wife, child, or dependent son or daughter of a lawful nonimmigrant alien who died as a result of the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks against the United States.

How far back do we go?

Sets forth provisions respecting: (1) noncitizen Armed Forces membership; (2) surveillance programs, including aerial and unmanned aerial surveillance; (3) a Northern Border Prosecution Initiative; (4) reimbursement of Southern Border State and county prosecutors for prosecuting federally initiated drug cases; (5) screening of municipal waste; (6) border security on federal land; and (7) parole and status adjustment relief for qualifying widows and orphans.

Initial Entry, Adjustment, and Citizenship Assistance Grant Act of 2007 – Authorizes the Secretary to award initial entry, status adjustment, and citizenship assistance grants to qualifying community-based organizations.

Amends the Intelligence Reform and Terrorism Prevention Act of 2004 to extend the travel document plan deadline.

Blah blah blah…. Let’s get to the meat, if it’s not too much trouble.

States that English is the national language of the United States. Requires the government to preserve and enhance the role of English as the national language of the United States.

This was recently brought up in a Democrat presidential debate and all but one candidate said he believed English should be the national language of the United States. Of course, it already is, but so is Spanish.

Democrats like most of those running for president claim to be compassionate people, but are really closet racists.

Every non-Latino immigrant group learns English without the help of the government. Bi-lingual education only means Spanish. When you watch television and turn on the SAP feature, there is only one option. When you ride on public transportation or enter a public building, everything is written in English and Spanish and as other immigrant groups don’t get the same treatment, someone has obviously decided that Latinos are just too stupid to learn English.

Don’t blame that one on a conservative….

Amends the Homeland Security Act of 2002 to establish the Office of Internal Corruption Investigation.

This will be one busy office.

Does anyone think all of a sudden all the fraud will just go away just because some people will be suddenly legal? By the way, there will be an almost immediate run for our border should this bill go through. What makes us think that once here, all the newly arrived legal-illegals will play by the rules?

Directs the Secretary to adjust to permanent resident status specified asylee applicants who are members of a persecuted religious minority.

Was the Council on American-Islamic Relations in on the closed-door meetings with La Raza as well? Muslims are sure demanding a lot of special treatment (while discriminating against non-Muslims) as of late.

Intercountry Adoption Reform Act of 2007 or the ICARE Act -Establishes an Office of Intercountry Adoptions within the Department of State to be headed by the Ambassador at Large for Intercountry Adoptions.

Sets forth Office functions, including: (1) approval of family to adopt (divided into U.S. regions); (2) child adjudication; (3) family services; (4) international policy development; and (5) administration and enforcement.

Maybe we can implement that Act once every American child who needs a home here can be placed in one, without all the red tape that pushes people to seek Intercountry adoption. It’s not that childless Americans want foreign children (Hollywood starlets excluded), but that the bureaucracy makes it not worth the aggravation.

Revises provisions for automatic citizenship for children born outside the United States, including adopted children.

Not much change here and is perfectly reasonable when concerning at least one American parent and a child either born or adopted outside our borders. Applies to a lot of servicemembers who bred overseas (as I did).

Establishes a nonimmigrant W-visa for an adoptable child coming to the United States for adoption by a U.S. citizen and spouse jointly or by an unmarried U.S. citizen at least 25 years of age who has been approved by the Office of International Adoption of the Department of State.

Okay, this is a little odd.

How many children over 25 years of age get adopted? The only reason someone adopt a 25 year old unless to get around immigration regulations. Then again, if there is a regulation, this must be more common than we think.

Woody Allen will love that one.

Sets forth adoption-related enforcement and penalty provisions.

Yeah, like any kind of enforcement and penalty provisions scared any illegal into obeying our laws. Even our own Department of Justice is holding out on telling us just how bad the problem is.

There’s a whole section about penalties should someone violate this Act. Somehow obeying our laws are the last things some of these illegals are concerned with. Just ask Bob Clark, Adrienne Shelly, and considering the Mexican government will not extradite any suspect facing a life sentence back to the United States, the list of victims of crimes by illegal aliens here will get longer, and longer, and longer, while President Bush accuses people like myself of scaring the general public.

Until Mr. Bush, Senators Kennedy and the rest have to live with the ramifications of their failed legislation, more people will be killed by reckless illegal aliens here in American than our soldiers being killed in Iraq.

History will repeat itself and the American people will pay the price.

Our elected officials may get the last laugh today, but an elephant never forgets and November 2008 is not that far away.

Bob Parks is a staff writer for the New Media Alliance, Inc. ( The New Media Alliance is a non-profit (501c3) national coalition of writers, journalists and grass-roots media outlets.

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