Sex in Handicapped Bathroom Trumps College Football Game


By: John Lillpop

Lois Feldman, a married mother of three, is unlikely to be in much of a festive spirit this Thanksgiving, given her experiences over the past week.

It all started when Mrs. Feldman left her seat during a college football game in Minneapolis last Saturday evening in order to “answer the call of nature.”

Put succinctly, she had to tinkle.

However, Mother Nature summoned Feldman to a much higher calling: The 38-year old ended up in a sexual skidoo with another football fan, a chap named Ross Walsh, 26.

In order to accommodate that urgent calling, Feldman and Walsh converted a handicapped toilet stall in the men’s restroom of the football stadium into an impromptu love nest.

The couple’s amorous activities soon drew an excited and intoxicated crowd of observers and cheerleaders, fans bored by the lopsided score of the game which Iowa eventually won 55-0.

Soon police were called to the scene and Feldman and Walsh were interrupted “in the act” and ticketed for indecent conduct, a misdemeanor.

Later in the week, Feldman was fired from an assisted living center, where she had been an administrator, because of the bad press.

In her defense, Feldman pointed out that she had so much wine that she doesn’t remember anything about the incident.

“I don’t know who this man is,” she said about Walsh, her lover. “I just found out his name in the paper last night.”

“It’s ruined my life,” she said through tears today. “Not just the incident but the press.”

Especially the press, right Lois?

Only irresponsible journalists bent on destroying two young lives would even bother to file a story about two complete strangers having intercourse in a handicapped toilet stall during a football game and being ticketed for same.

What is journalism coming to?

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