Touch That Nigerian’s Junk!

By: Michael John McCrae

A few days ago there was a big stink (pun intended) over an extended TSA inspection of an 80-year-old lady in a wheelchair whose adult diaper was soiled. This incident, coupled with “pat-downs” of 6-year-old children and the “junk-touching” of travelers moving through the nation’s various airports has soiled (pun again intended) the reputation of those who have held the responsibility for safe air travel since the massive and intrusive searches were mandated by Radical Islam’s attack on America in 2001.

Now, I have no problem with TSA doing its job thoroughly and responsibly. I travel by air frequently enough and have been searched in every possible way. I’ve had my toothpaste and my nail file confiscated, was barred from boarding a plane with what was left of a cup of coffee (had to gulp the remainder) and was retained once for resembling a wanted poster (which I thought highly insulting as I am much more handsome than the suspect someone thought I resembled). Just TSA guys and gals doing a tough job, made much tougher each time some Muslim scumbag terrorist thwarts any edge on security.

So imagine my frustration at reading the report of June 30th entitled: “Investigation Launched After Nigerian Man Boards U.S. Plane With Expired Boarding Pass, No Passport”!


The report begins: “A Nigerian national boarded a Virgin America flight from New York to Los Angeles last week without a passport and with an expired boarding pass that did not belong to him.Authorities are looking into how Olajide Oluwaseun Noibi boarded Virgin America Flight 415 at John F. Kennedy International Airport on June 24 without a valid passport or identification.”

Now I could probably make some wisecrack about airports named after Democrats, but this is too damn serious for that. This is what happens when a country does NOT profile known terrorist characteristics. The TSA will look harder at grandmothers in wheelchairs or 6-year-old children. They will look harder at ME; a 59-year-old, 30-year Army, white American Veteran with an Independent voting record and they will desire to pat down any blond Swedish lady in a tight sweater (who wouldn’t?): before a “Nigerian national with no passport and a boarding pass that doesn’t jive with his expired “University of Michigan identification card”! The Nigerian gets to board the plane! I have to gulp down my hot coffee! Granny has to shed her “Depends”!
The flight was already on its merry way to Los Angeles before the un-profiled Nigerian was even noticed. From the report: “Mid-flight from New York to Los Angeles, a flight attendant noticed Noibi was sitting in a seat that was supposed to be vacant. Noibi showed the attendant the expired boarding pass that was in someone else’s name, and then showed him a University of Michigan identification card with his picture on it.”

Well, now I could say something about foreign nationals attending the University of Michigan which happens to be in a highly taxed and extremely liberal state, governed by a Democrat, but I may just comment on the inability of the INS to track illegal’s with expired student visas. From the article: “University of Michigan spokeswoman Kelly Cunningham said that Noibi is not a current student, but was enrolled as an engineering student at Ann Arbor between 2004 and 2006.”

The erstwhile illegal alien has been stealing boarding passes and flying around the United States since 2006! From the article: “The boarding pass belonged to a man who said his boarding pass went missing from his pocket on his way to the airport June 23. Noibi boarded the plane with the expired pass the next day.”

To add insult to all this TSA injury, our friendly neighborhood illegal Nigerian national was not immediately taken into custody upon arrival in California! I could now say something extremely insensitive about the TSA, the FBI and the local liberal Californian authorities, but I’ll let the article speak for me: “Noibi was arrested Wednesday when law enforcement officials saw him trying to board another flight and discovered he had “10 boarding passes in various individual’s names,” according to an FBI affidavit obtained by “

He’s bold; he’s brave; he’s a thief, a pickpocket, an illegal Nigerian gadabout who wasn’t “arrested” until “law enforcement officials saw him tying to board another flight”! I suppose if Noibi had been wearing an adult diaper the TSA might have paid him a bit more attention.

I do believe the TSA owes someone an apology. I also believe the TSA at JFK International Airport needs to have their collective “junk” inspected!

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