The Fine Tuning of the Sex Box by Kerry L Marsala (9/16/04)

Generally one should never take serious stock in polls, studies, and survey's. The participants chosen and the questions asked often have too many variables. The studies and research done need to be looked at with a careful eye, and logical reasoning must be applied. The sum of truth is usually found somewhere in the mixture of numerical data and the various organizations delivery of their own biases. Dump all the information studied, dissected and staged under a microscope into a blender and you'll find proof in your own observances within your daily living. There's more fact in observing societal trends over a period of time and in various circumstances, than there is in a controlled, minute group.

The Rand research organization recently conducted a study on the effects of adolescents who watch too much sexually charged TV. The premise was (a one-year survey of 1,792 adolescents between the ages of 12 to 17) that large amounts of television containing sexual content encouraged our youth to begin engaging in sexual intercourse or other sexual acts far sooner than their peers who didn't watch sexually explicit TV. A year after-- the study conducted by Rand-- compared the two groups. Their statistics confirmed that those who watched fewer sex filled programs were less likely to be engaging at an age prior to comprehension of the ramifications of overt sexual behaviors. The impact on those children who often watched television shows with sexual content or discussion of sexual topics was an increase in their sexual behaviors to begin earlier and most of them had notable regrets.

Certainly as we tune into our cultural habits and view them for what they are, we don't need another study to show what our entertainment industry produces. We can see the negative impact on our youth, it's all around us. Hollywood's ideals have become so blatantly skewed, they are filled with fake boobs, butt lifts, skin abrasions, botox injections and unrealistic Barbie and Ken dolls to be paraded around as the perfect sex toy. The entertainment industry will deny any influence, but if this were so why do we have commercials directed at our children to buy certain products? Marketing shows you repeat the Skittles candy commercial enough times and your children will be asking you to buy Skittles so they can "taste the rainbow of flavors." We'd have to be living our lives in a cave somewhere in "nowhere land" not to comprehend what our children are becoming and how the marketing industry works hand in hand with the entertainment industry to sell all of us on an idea.

If you really don't have a clue as a parent as to the effects of sexed up TV try this experiment. Drive your child to school and look around at what little clothing there is on these young bodies. Stroll the malls on a Friday night and observe the window dressing's of certain clothing stores. Some Thursday night chaperone a school's dance and note the sexual dance moves. It's time to take notice-- it's getting harder to tell who the children are and who the paid prostitutes are. Both females and males have become obsessed with looking sexy; this isn't a singular gender problem. Open a teen magazine and see young girls wearing provocative clothing and posing with young males in sexual positions. Is this our message to our youth? -- Dress and behave in this manner and the world will be yours. The spike of interest in creating an image of sexual prowess is fast becoming the common mode for all our children, starting for some as early as four years old. Isn't posing our children to look like sexual playthings child pornography?

The findings by Rand researches really were already confirmed. The facts spread far beyond the 1,792 adolescents over the yearlong study. But, I do believe Rand offers a sensible approach to curbing our sexed up youth. The remedy is called--being a parent, parental involvement. Parents, whether we want the status or not, seem to hold the master key to unlocking our children's views of themselves and where they belong in this world. Such a big responsibility, but one we all decided to take on when we gave life to another being-- at conception.

Parental rights give us the authority to turn off certain programs, to refuse certain movies and music from entering our homes and to hold the credit card power of purchasing only the clothes that cover the body. We as parents have the authority to be parents, we are not our children's playmates, best friends, pals, or buddies-we are parents. Parenthood calls for structure, guidelines, judgement calls, being nosy, setting parameters, bending when necessary and lovingly molding our children into polite, well behaved, respectful, and confident adults. This may mean our child may want to watch a questionable TV show or movie, if your research shows that there may be something gained from the experience of viewing, watch it and discuss it with them. Our children may act as if they don't care what we think, but they do. They are constantly seeking our approval; parental approval gives children that needed self-assuredness to withstand many awkward or possibly dangerous situations. Being their "buddy" and letting them loose to run with their own devices just creates unstable, low self-esteemed children. Behind the roll of the eyes, deep sighs, and the look of "your ruining my life" our children are begging us to be their lawmakers and guides. With 46% of our U.S. high school students reporting they have had sexual intercourse, but also stating they wished they'd waited longer in becoming active, it is quite clear that our young people are not prepared for the consequences.

Take control of the TV remote, music players, and clothing. We don't need little miniature whores running around painted up and pretending to be dogs in heat. The children of this generation are now struggling through a sexier and rougher period of time than we've ever known. Ten-year-olds shouldn't be receiving or giving oral sex to their boyfriend or girlfriend, nor should they be conducting any other type of sexual liaison prior to a martial commitment. If the TV or entertainment in our homes is contributing to any form of unhealthy or immoral behaviors do we not owe it to our children to protect them from harm?

Talk is cheap but, your time and interest are invaluable. The power of the on/off button on your television's remote control is easily punched, and your sacrifice of love will come back to you a hundred fold . Fine tune your household-- give structure, guidelines, and love-- it’s the beginning to letting our children be children.

K L. Marsala is a commentator on social, cultural and political ideologies. She is co-publisher of Sarah's Seed Journal and has published one book, with number two waiting in the wings.

Ms. Marsala tries to use a bit of satire every now and then in her writing. She has been praised by many of her readers for saying it "like it is" and speaks for the common person who believes in American ideals, especially our freedoms. Stating the way she sees it with "punch," her philosophy remains that no matter the event, you can always find a bit of humor or the human element of hope somewhere amongst the cracks.