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The Future Assault on All Holidays By Justin Darr (12/29/04)

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Americans have had may victories this past Christmas season against anti-Christian forces and, in the words of William F. Buckley, taken a stand against political correctness by yelling 'Stop,' at a time when no one is inclined to do so. But Christmas is over now, and by this time visions of Christmas sugarplums are probably dancing rapidly out of your head giving way to the traditional debates of when to take down the Christmas tree, how long is too long to leave the Christmas lights up, and just how are you going to purge the living room of mounds of wrapping paper. However, one thing that Americans should not pack away until next Christmas along with Santas cookie plate is our dedication to protect the Christmas holiday from the politically correct forces who seek to destroy it. Christmas is just the first battle in the Culture War being waged on the American way of life by the left. Unless we are vigilant, soon all of our treasured national holidays will be face the same fate as Christmas because they do not reflect multiculturalisms skewed vision of diversity.

The chief argument against traditional Christmas displays and celebrations is that they do not reflect the diversity of modern American society. Third graders singing It Came Along a Midnight Clear is not harmless holiday entertainment for their parents, but a heinous violation of church and state that vilely discriminates against non-Christians by forcing them to experience the dreaded emotion of possibly feeling uncomfortable. The ranks of the potentially uncomfortable are for larger than you might think. According to the 2001 "American Religious Identification Survey," by The Graduate Center of the City University of New York, only 77% of Americans are Christian. Despite the fact that this study only counts Protestants and Catholics as Christian, excluding millions of nondenominational Christians and other religious groups who define themselves as Christian (such as the Mormons), there are potentially 47 million non-Christian Americans who might be irrevocably harmed by the sight of a cardboard cut out of a nativity scene in a public park.

Alright, so what is the point? There are lots of people who do not celebrate Christmas and we should be sensitive and respectful of their beliefs so long as they do infringe on our own. So lets move on to New Years and restart the fight for Christmas next November. However, this numbers game of declaring holidays intolerant based on population statistics of those who might not share the same values or cultural heritage as the majority of Americans can be used by the left to destroy any other American holiday of their choosing.

For example, according to the Census Bureau, there are approximately 25 million non-citizens living in the United States. How dare we celebrate the Fourth of July! Uncle Sam marching about, country fairs, and huge fireworks displays only serve to remind these tens of millions that they are far from home in a foreign land that does not share many of their traditions and history. Why I assume that these intolerant displays of American nationalism could even make many of these people feel uncomfortable. So Americans must stop celebrating their Independence Day in the way they have for years due to its prejudiced and non-inclusive nature. School children may no longer sing The Star Spangled Banner and not even fully instrumental renditions of Stars and Stripes Forever shall be permitted because they might remind these non-citizens that they are living in America. Do not even begin to sing The Battle Hymn of the Republic. God, respect for the military, and America all in the same song, forget about it. At the very least any public display of an image of the Liberty Bell, Statue of Liberty, or the Constitution, should also be accompanied by representations of the Bastille, the flag of the United Nations, and The Communist Manifesto.

Then there is Labor Day. According to the 2000 Census, over 50 million Americans can be classified as disabled. If we can cancel Christmas because 47 million people are not Christian, how can we possibly justify a national holiday where even more people are discriminated against? A day set aside to honor a nations workers does nothing but make those who are unable to work reflect on their physical disabilities and feel excluded. Dare we say this holiday could make many of them feel uncomfortable? Then away it must go. Labor Day should be replaced with a celebration of Americas diversity called The Thinking About Doing Something You Might Not Want to Do Festival.

Memorial Day unfairly elevates 25 million living veterans over the rest of us. Thanksgiving discriminates against the 2.5% of Americas population who are vegetarians and encourages the wonton slaughter or turkeys (and allegedly endorses illicit prayer around dinner tables). Valentines Day oppresses loners, Groundhog Day discriminates against the alternative small rodent population, Arbor Day encourages people to increase the number of trees that directly degrade the lives of those with tree pollen allergies and April Fools Day advocates Americans disingenuously acting like liberals. There is no national holiday acceptable to the lefts standard of fairness, inclusiveness, and multiculturalism without draconian and flat out silly revisions.

The goal of the left is not primarily the destruction of the Christmas holiday and the relegation of its Christian adherents to the fringes of the social order, but the destruction of American society in general. If Americans are not permitted to celebrate those things that reflect Americas past and traditions as they see fit, then slowly they will begin to lose their impact and importance. What begins with Christmas will spread out to all other holidays until there will be nothing for America to celebrate except the sanitized, bland, everything is fine so long as it feels good dogma of the left. Unless this assault on our holidays is stopped, America will lose its heritage, its culture, and eventually its moral compass.

Justin Darr
justindarr@juno.com